Buying alcohol (legally), gambling (legally), and getting into 21+ clubs (is it illegal if they let you in underage?), are just some things that you get to learn once you’re 21. Of course, along with every perk that comes along when you turn 17/18 years old. 

At this age, many of us are prone to bumping into the proverbial stage of “No longer a teenager…when the fuck did I become a young adult?”. I think it’s a consensus that there are many things in our life that we have yet to learn; especially about how to love, handling responsibility, and being an adult in general. 

But honestly, there are just some things you should KNOW how to do by now as a young adult. And if you don’t know how to do these following things, please either learn how to, find a friend who knows how to teach you, scold parents who didn’t teach you, or bow down to parents who did teach you but you failed to learn/cooperate and admit you were a horrible son/daughter. 

1) Clean all the things - Let’s be real here. If you lived through high-school with your mom doing the laundry, washing the dishes, and keeping the house spick and span without your help, it should have hit you in college that you’re pretty much worthless and will probably end up in an episode of hoarders. Okay, some of us grow up being naturally neat…but, if you don’t know how to do the laundry, wash dishes, sweep the floor, wipe the windows/mirror, dust  the room, scrub the toilet…etc, you should really get on that. There is nothing more annoying than having a room-mate that doesn’t know how to do any of these. It is not an excuse for you to make them clean all your shit, just because you don’t know how to. 

2) Dress like a decent semi-professional - Please, no one is asking you to dress up like you’d be on the cover of vogue or even on the ad of a fashion designer. If anything, at least try to look like you know what’s age appropriate. Have that essential tie and shirt with PROPER shoes ready to be used at anytime. Heck, have a few! Just know that at some point in your life, those who are the same age as you will judge you for wearing sweatpants on a regular basis. 

3) Not ask your parents for everything - Having a job during college is sometimes hard. For those of us with difficult majors, it’s almost impossible to juggle both. BUT, there are things such as work-study that helps you do both. Your parents have been paying for you, and they’re still probably paying for your college education. So how about give them a break and find some way to pay for your own shit. 

4) Say no - Peer pressure and the likes will never really go away. However, as you mature (and I say that very loosely), you really should know your limitations and what you stand up for. Saying no is really what sets your apart from the mindless drones and it will save your ass from wishing you never said yes seconds from something horrible happen to you.

5) Keep informed about your world - Times of living in ignorant bliss is so passé and is reserved for high schoolers who are limited to having opinions in areas such as music and who’s hot. Take the time to read/watch news and actually figure out that there is a world revolving and living despite the fact that you’ve done nothing with your life. If anything, it’s for you to be able to keep up and not look like a dumbass when you’re more informed friends talk about current events. 

6) How to do things manually - Everything is automated, but technology is a bitch and can’t be trusted all the time. Learn how to write legibly, use a thread and a needle to sew that ripped clothing, cook your own meals, and if you’re really up to it, change a flat tire. (honestly, i don’t even know how to change a flat tire, but only because I don’t have a car). The point is, self-sufficiency is something that is down-right taken granted for with everything being handed to us by automation. You know what they say about people good with their hands…

7) Stop being afraid of those things you call “feelings” - Okay, being all mopey and dealing with teen angst is not what I mean. There are certain feelings like vulnerability, trust, and over-all self-esteem issues that we are so keen on running away from. Learn to take it all in, process it logically, and solve those bad feelings in a healthy manner. Reaction to how we feel is instilled in us since we were born. Actually doing something about our problems and feelings is the next step to being an adult. 

So yes, hopefully if you’re  a functioning young adult, you should be able to employ these listed know-hows into your life. If not…it takes time, but please do invest in learning how to do so. 

Remember when you were a tiny little thing, so innocent, so naive, so angelic (well some of us were)? Almost everything was a first, and even if it wasn’t, we had the attention span of a nut and thought everything was a first anyway. Every little feeling like the first time you (consciously remember) getting a toy, getting your first A, up to having your first crush. Don’t forget the bad stuff too, like your first major injury (aka boo-boo), the first time you failed a test, the first time (and probably not last) time you felt betrayed. Well, for most of us, these “first-timers” have already been dwindling and the little square boxes next to them on the list are being checked off. 

I’m a late bloomer is a LOT of cases. So some things I’m still waiting on are:

1) My first feeling of not giving a fuck - I feel like this is something that will never happen, but in the case that it does, it would probably be very liberating. I feel like not giving a fuck about what anyone else thinks or what will happen is a trade off. Concern is an important feeling that’s fundamental to motivation and general success in relationships. I would assume a lot has to have happened to me if I ever truly felt like whatever comes next is not a concern. 

2) My first “mutual chemistry” - I’ve never really felt this. Having that confidence that someone is in sync with you. That so called feeling when you lock eyes with someone and both you and them just instantly smile to each other. Can we just have that happen soon and while we’re at it, have “Call me Maybe” playing on the radio. 

3) My first big check - Okay, so I have gotten some pretty decent checks from when I had co-op. But still, they never went up to $500. Let’s just hope the next 3 years of pharmacy school go by smoothly and I’ll be making 6 figs on the get go. It’s sad to think that the first couple of years, all that money will be going to my loans…uggghhh

4) My first big rejection - from a person/job/anything. I’ve always been pretty lucky having never been rejected from anyone or anything. At least, my brain hasn’t gone into “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless mind” mode yet, so there could very well be something so tragic my mind has deleted its very memory. I got accepted to all the colleges I applied to, made friends with people I like, and gotten positions I’ve striven for. Part of me accounts this to simply never having put myself to that kind of risk (in terms of people anyway). So my current thoughts of being “not good enough” are all simply endogenous imaginations my mind is telling me without (hopefully) any evidence from external factors. 

5) My first kiss - Yup. Still haven’t gotten that yet. The so called butterflies just before you go for it/they lean in. I’m thinking that for my first time, my heart will explode out of my chest and I’ll end up fainting onto their lap. In which case, I hope they don’t take that as a sign for skipping to third. 

6) My first date/falling in love/time having sex/all things sexual - Okay, well this is in line with the first kiss. In fact, I’ve made it convenient for you all to just know how much I lack any experience in this field. If it weren’t for my ability to delude myself to thinking some people still find this endearing, I’d probably be the most pathetic person of my generation. 

7) My first feeling of loss - Oh my goodness, I don’t even want to think about this, but it’s something we all will feel. The closest I have gone to this was a church member who basically was the reason for being baptized who died on the day of my baptism. Always felt like that was destiny in a way. But God forbid, if/when my dog and/or my family/partner dies…I KNOW I will be a wreck. 

Obviously there are a shit ton more. But, I feel like these are pretty much the basics that everyone would go through. I know some of these I will definitely experience! Let’s just hope it’s the good ones!